Eagles Fan to Boo “Whoever”
April 22, 2008 –
With the 2008 NFL Draft just days away, Eagles fan Glenn Bristol is reporting that he will once again travel to New York City to boo whoever the Eagles happen to choose. "I'm going up to Radio City [Music Hall] on Saturday morning, and you'd better believe I'll have my booin' shoes on," the 44-year-old electrician said yesterday. "No, I mean, seriously–I have booin' shoes."
 The Mayfair native said that he has made the draft-day booing trip each year since 1999, when he lustily booed the selection of quarterback Donovan McNabb over running back Ricky Williams. "That was the first time I ever went, and it turned out to be one of the greatest days of booing in Eagles history," he marveled. "It was just such a great feeling to be up there, booing your team along with everybody else." He added that even though the choice turned out to be the correct one, his love of draft-day jeering had not been diminished. "Sure, McNabb obviously worked out better than that pothead Williams," he acknowledged. "But when you get to boo a Freddie Mitchell or a Todd Pinkston? You really end up feeling like you're a part of something bigger."
Pete Gallipoli, 39, who has accompanied Bristol on the annual pilgrimage since 2003, said that the two had done their homework to properly boo this year's selections. "The Eagles are pickin' 19th, and they need some help on the o-line, and maybe the secondary," he said. "So if they pick, say, a tight end or a tailback, we'll boo. Although, y'know, we'll boo whoever." Bristol agreed. "I kind of hope they'll take this kid [cornerback Dominique] Rodgers-Cromartie out of Tennessee State," he said. "If he drops that far, man, he'd be a real steal. But that doesn't mean I won't still boo him."
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Brand-New Flyers Fan Not Fooling Anybody
April 22, 2008 –
Acquaintances of self-proclaimed Flyers fan Joel Harrison are asserting that the 33-year-old's interest in hockey has coincided precisely with the team's hotly contested first-round playoff series against the Washington Capitals. "The other day, he comes in, saying, 'Boy, how 'bout that J.R. Humburger?'" smirked Derrick Grey, 37, who works in Comcast's installation department with Harrison. "He's trying to act like he's always followed [the Flyers], but it's obvious he'd never watched them before Game 1. Or probably even Game 2 or 3."
41-year-old Troy Latham, a Pennsport neighbor of Harrison, was similarly dismissive of the transparently nascent fanship. "Joel came over to watch Game 5, and at one point he was screaming that the Caps had more guys on the ice than the Flyers," he said, rolling his eyes. "I was going to explain penalties to him, but I decided to just let it go." According to coworker William Murphy, 46, "[Harrison] is a nice guy, but I don't know how much longer I can hear him talking about 'shutting down Orvechkind.'"
Harrison, however, seemed unaware that his flimsy devotion to the Flyers had been called into question. "Oh, man, I've always loved 'em, going back to when they had Don Hextall and Pat LaFontineé," he insisted. "I don't always talk about hockey, but trust me, I love those Broad Street Bulldogs." Grey, for his part, hoped that Harrison's ill-informed Flyers enthusiasm ended soon. "I hope to God they win tonight," he said, referring to the team's do-or-die Game 7. "But if they're eliminated? At least I won't have to listen to Joel's nonsense any longer." |
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