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Nutter-Directed It’s Always Sunny Scene a Real Drag
June 24, 2008 – The cast and crew of the FX Network's It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia are already expressing regret at their decision to invite Mayor Michael Nutter to shoot one of the show's scenes earlier this month. "We basically just thought it'd be a cool thing to have the mayor shoot a scene," Rob McElhenny, the often-vulgar comedy's creator and one of its stars, said yesterday. "But he really took things into his own hands–and the whole scene ended up being just completely pussy. We're probably going to have to reshoot the whole fuckin' thing."

Nutter-Directed It's Always Sunny Scene a Real DragFred Savage, who directed the bulk of the episode, explained the mayor's ill-advised changes. "Originally, Charlie [Day] was trawling for change [in Logan Square's Swann Fountain], pegging homeless people with pennies, and, at one point, peeing in the water," he said. "But Nutter kept stopping the camera and going, 'You know, maybe we should do this instead.' By the time he was through with it, Nutter had Charlie sitting on a bench, lecturing a little kid about 'civic responsibility.' It was terrible." Day was similarly disillusioned. "What the hell was he doing?" he shrieked. "That guy didn't know what the hell he was doing! It was shit! It was shit!"

Nutter, though, seemed unaware that his time behind the camera had been viewed so unfavorably. "It was really a lot of fun, I thought," he said. "I did tone things down a bit, but I think it's actually funnier the way it is now, to tell you the truth. Call it artistic license." Day, though, had harsher words for the mayor's directorial debut. "That guy can be the mayor, that's fine if he wants to be the mayor," he said, nervously scratching at his scalp. "But if I knew I'd have to say all that stuff about helping people, I'd've been like, 'Hey there, buddy, just keep the fuck away!'"
 
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South St. Merchants Angered by Bookstore
June 24, 2008 – Owners of shops along South St. are expressing disillusionment at the opening of an Atlantic Books outlet on the 900 block of the popular commercial strip. "I think it's an absolute disgrace," said Condom Kingdom's Angela LeVarr as she restocked a shelf of vibrating butt plugs. "Books on South St.–what's this world coming to?"

South St. Merchants Angered by BookstoreSteve Taylor, of Time Out novelties, was dismayed by the apparent reversal of gains recently made in the neighborhood. "The Book Trader used to be a few shops down, and it was a real relief to see them go," he remembered, leaning against a display of switchblades and water pipes. "I thought we were done dealing with reading, and all the bad stuff that comes along with it." Rachel Lin, of Exxtasy, agreed. "I think that being associated with ideas and thoughts and stuff will really hurt us," she said from her erotic-clothing store, which specializes in whips, ball gags, and crotchless panties. "It'll really detract from the charm of the whole street."

Eric Westerfield, regional manager of the controversial book chain, had expected such a chilly reception. "We knew it would be an uphill battle to sell this sort of stuff on South St," he admitted, embarrassedly holding up a Charles Dickens paperback. "But all I ask is that our neighbors give us a chance. We're really not bad people." Judging by LeVarr's statements, though, reconciliation seemed unlikely. "For the life of me, I can't understand why someone would think it's okay to sell books here," she fumed, ringing up a trembling man's pee-fetish DVDs. "These people have no shame."
 
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